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The Nirnroot Preservation Society

November 25, 2011

(this post is in reference to the video game, Elder Scrolls IV: Oblivion)

My friends, we are in a time of crisis. As I pen these words, Oblivion Gates open all over Cyrodiil and daedra pour forth slaughtering innocent people. Sadly, this disaster is compounded by the superstitious thinking of the government, which has allowed the problem to keep growing rather than addressing the central cause: nirnroot poaching. As many of you may know, every time a spell is cast, it releases magicarboflourins into the atmosphere. Normally, these pollutants are released at a slow enough rate that they can be absorbed by the nirnroot and converted into harmless gasses. However, between the Mage Guild’s civil war and the rampant increase in violence, as well as the ever dwindling population of nirnroot, Tamriel faces disaster.

The mages guild has been furiously lobbying the Imperial Palace to prevent either “cap and cast” or magika taxation from addressing this problem. None of the provinces are willing to implement real reform when their efforts will simply be undercut by cheating from the others. Why, the Colovians ask, should we reduce our magika when the Imperials used magik to build their economy and now are demanding that we sacrifice our economy to save them from the consequences of their past actions? Political solutions to reducing magika use are at an impasse, which brings me to the only feasible solution: stop the rampant nirnroot poaching. Nirnroot is the only species of plants in all of Tamriel which does not respawn! One picked, it is gone forever. It is critically endangered, with less than 50 known specimens across the entire continent. Nirnroot is at high risk for genetic bottlenecking, and is at risk for habitat destruction. Even without further population decreases, it is possible that nirnroot could lose it’s ability to filter magika polution from our atmosphere. Don’t believe the nonsensical myths about “dragonfires” and rumors of an all powerful “amulet of kings”. Dragonfires will only worsen the magika pollution and no amount of chanting will solve our problems. According to Else God-Hater, a noted theologian and magical researcher, the 9 Divines do not care for our stuggles and will just allow Mehrunes Dagon to invade Cyrodiil, unless we act to solve our problems for ourselves. Join the Nirnroot Preservation Society TODAY!

Update: In Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim, both crimson and normal nirnroot respawn every 10 days.

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